Tuesday, March 02, 2010

Turn on all of them there lights, partner!!

March 27 is "Hug a Hippie Day," also known as "Earth Day," so it's as good a time as any to celebrate human achievement and the exploitation of the giant ball of minerals we know as Earth that has, through the inventive mind of humans, given us a standard of living unmatched in history.

Here's a Facebook page that is coordinating "Human Achievement Hour."

So, turn on them there lights, raise the heat in the house, turn on the car's motor, salute a nuclear reactor, bake a dozen chocolate-chip cookies in a hot oven, put the fridge on #1, plug in the humidifiers and dehumidifiers and heat lamps and suntan beds and tread mills and computers and vibrators, start up the lawnmowers and weedwackers and chainsaws and leaf-blowers, set a box of matches aflame, flick your Bics, light a stogie or some illegal form of vegetation, get the fireplace raging, turn on the ceiling fans.

Then get in your bathing suit, grab a bottle of red, open the blinds, and smile broadly at the wonders of mankind as the hippies rant and rage on Planet Earth.

Salut!