Friday, March 05, 2010

Fucking-A right, goody-two-shoes!

Several years ago, some Christian bitch-dick in Texas tried to stampede Texans and the rest of the world into taking the "hell" out of "hello." He got bitch-slapped by practicality. Even his fellow Christians (most of them, anyway) told him to go to hell-o.

He got his fifteen minutes of mockery, and now comes the perennial copycat. This time it's a punk-ass bitch teenager in South Pasadena, CA, who started the No Cussing Club three years ago in middle school.

The disease has been contracted in 20 countries, where similar smug-clubs have begun. "Next year, I want to do a world tour," the punk-ass bitch simpered this week. "Cussing is a hard habit to break, but anyone can do it."

Never ones to let the bandwagon roll by, California lawmakers passed a resolution last week establishing the first week of March as "Cuss Free Week." And the cute little lawmakers are passing around a "cuss jar" for those whose tongues slip.

Aw shucks! Perhaps the lawmakers will grant reprieves for the wealthy Californians regularly raped by the California tax code. Or, better yet, help slim down that $20 billion state deficit by following Tiger Woods around at the annual Torey Pines golf tournament with the cuss jar.

Now, cussing isn't any good if you do it all the time. You gotta be choosy, and the word has to fit the criminal. There are times when only cussing can truly capture the repulsive dregs we encounter in our lives -- from the punk-ass PC bitches above to monster pricks like Al Gore, ObaMa, Ubermann, Pat Robertson and the Clintons.

Fucking-A right!

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